


RP: The Continued Awkward Escapades of Donald and Drake

by AJtheBlueJay, ToonQueen



Category: Darkwing Duck (Cartoon 1991), Disney Duck Universe, DuckTales (Cartoon 2017), PKNA - Paperinik New Adventures
Genre: Alcohol, Awkwardness, Bipolar Disorder, Bipolar Drake, Bisexual Character, Bisexual Donald, Clubbing, Comedy, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Shenanigans, Friendship, Gen, Gyms, Lunch, M/M, Roleplay, Secret Crush, Superheroes, Training, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2020-12-17 11:04:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21053354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJtheBlueJay/pseuds/AJtheBlueJay, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToonQueen/pseuds/ToonQueen
Summary: A series of unlucky events and a secret crush lead to some awkward moments between best friends Donald Duck and Drake Mallard, as they try to figure out if that's all they are.





	1. Last Third Winter Night's Dream

**Author's Note:**

> These roleplay excerpts were originally published at negaverse.net/duckverse. The original format of back-and-forth posts has been preserved.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mess starts with stray arrows from Cupid finding Donald and Drake, leading to a lovey-dovey moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten by Goku-San (Drake) [goku-san on Tumblr] and ToonQueen (Cupid) [ToonQueen on Tumblr]
> 
> Originally published February 13-15, 2019

By [Agent Gemini](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/owner/agentgemini) 13\. February 2019 [Comments (21)](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/view/108686/last-third-winter-nights-dream-open-rp#comments)

The weather was nice in the park for a day in mid February. It had snowed a few days prior. Today was warm enough to wear a jacket open without a hat. Yet, it was still cool enough for white snow to blanket the ground and in the tree branches.

Unseen by mortal eyes was a mammal in a white toga with small feathered wings. Though the wings looked too small to hold up a full grown adult body, the figure had no problem keeping a few feet of the ground. Cupid sighed, looking bored as he pulled an arrow from the quiver on his back. He looked for a target as he took a firmer grip on his bow.

Cupid was about to take aim at the average good couple, that being two nerds reading at opposite benches. However, someone walking by on the sidewalk that instead caught his attention.

He couldn't believe his eyes. There he saw a black haired duck, rushing to work fifteen minutes late with an overpriced coffee in her hand, that was Eris blessed. It was an unexpected sight, because known to him, Eris had not blessed a mortal in hundreds of years. And yet, this figure was definity young and mortal.

“How odd. Well, this should be exciting,” he took aim and fired an arrow at her. The arrow seemed to just disappear on impact. The femme duck was unaffected. This only confused Cupid more.

He pursued her firing a few more arrows as every one disappeared like the first. The target not knowing she was part of a hunt kept rushing towards an office building at the other side of the street from the park.

Cupid fired again. This time from the reflection of a parked truck he could see why his arrows were not sticking. They were passing through the Eris blessed mortal. Passing through, not affecting her, and hitting others beyond her.

When the winged deity realized this he took higher to the air to see the chaos he had unleashed. Every arrow he had rapid fired at the supposed agent of Eris was now instead on unintended victims. He slapped his own forehead. Even he should have known better not to mess with a harbinger of misfortune. Because of his carelessness this was all his fault.

Cupid looked over the victims from above, trying to figure out the best way to undo this. Suddenly, an alarm went off from his wrist watch, “Oh! Well, its break time. Gotta follow those Union rules.”

He let out a mischievous giggle before teleporting away in a shower of glitter and hearts mortal eyes could not see.

((You can have a character get hit by a random arrow while in the park and have chaos ensue. Cupid might try to fix it later. Might. No cap yet on how many characters but feel free to make a seperate post at any time that takes place during this but want to focus more on individual characters. ))

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [14\. February 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/108688/108686)

Donald was walking through the park this fine morning, enjoying the snow blanketing the ground. Bundled in a parka and mittens, he was keeping warm enough to be cozy as he admired the scenery.

A sudden sharpness from behind brought him out of this mood.

"WAK!" he yelped, looking behind and seeing the arrow stuck near his tail. He pulled it out, grumbling about what kind of person would do such a thing. As he began to look for the perpetrator, he spotted...them.

The most perfect duck in all the world. The apple of his eye. The cream in his coffee.

He ran to them with arms wide open.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [14\. February 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/108697/108686)

And who happened to be by on his way to the store was none other than Drake Mallard. Sometimes he liked to go through the park to enjoy some fresh air and also keep an eye out for any evildoers who might like to cause trouble.

That was when he saw Donald heading towards him with open arms. Before even a word had left his bill, he felt a sharp pain in his back side.

Their eyes locked and soon he was off to meet the oncoming duck to meet him halfway into a tight embrace.  
  
Oh no. Not again!

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [14\. February 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/108701/108686)

The walk up to their embrace felt like it was in slow-motion, like Daisy's favorite movies, but it felt so incredibly right as Donald glomped his special one. "Drakey-poo!" said Donald, planting kisses all over Drake's beak. "How are you doing this Valentine's Day?"

Probably doing great now that his arms were wrapped around the taller duck. That tall, dashing, dreamboat of a drake.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [14\. February 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/108706/108686)

"Donnie!" Drake blushed from the kisses. "I'm doing much better now that you're here."  
  
His own arms curled around the other drake to tighten the embrace. 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [15\. February 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/108761/108686)

Donald felt complete with Drake by his side. He wanted to spend the whole day with him.

"Whaddaya say we blow this joint and get a coffee, honey wumpus?" schmoozed Donald.


	2. The Wire Incident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drake brings up the Valentine's Day incident on social media, starting the awkward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten by Goku-San (Drake) and Rakish Raven (Quiverwing) (dullscythe on Tumblr)
> 
> Originally published September 13-14, 2019

Hiya, it's Don. So here's the dealio: while on the Wire one night, Quiverwing started sending pictures of him to Gyro he needed for "research." That's all I'll say about that. I called him Quivy and Gyro starts thinkin' that we're an item. Which is ridiculous considering anyone who sees my Wire profile can see that I'm dating One. So Drake chimes like:

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@Misunderstoodscientist](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/Misunderstoodscientist) "I can vouch that DA has a pet name for everyone he's friends with including me."

But Gyro has it in his head that these "friendships" I got are "beneficial." So I shut it down like:

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

Behind his phone screen, Donald was blushing like mad. [@Misunderstoodscientist](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/Misunderstoodscientist) "It's not like that, Gyro! There are no benefits ANYWHERE in my friendships!"

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@Misunderstoodscientist](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/Misunderstoodscientist) "Wait? Wat? You think we're in that kind of relationship?" If anyone could see him he was blushing madly as well.

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "I'm so sorry."

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "It's..ok.." But he couldn't help but still blush. "I didn't think anyone would ever see us as that."

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "It's weird, and I feel really weird about it." To be exact, he was squirming in his seat.

And then, _this_ happened, and here's where I dip. Toodles!

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) DW was unknowingly (or maybe he was) making it worse when he remembered an incident in the park on Valentine's Day involving Cupid's arrow. "Oh no. You don't think he saw us kissing in the park do you?" That's the only reason he thought that Gyro might thought they were friends with benefits.

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "Great shakin' scuttlefish, Drake! Why'd you hafta bring that up? I'm breaking out in hives thinking about it!"

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "Oh no. I'm so sorry."

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "Doggone it, Drake. Now it's out in the open for the whole world to see!"

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "I'm sorry! It slipped out!"

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "Angus Fangus is gonna have a field day if he sees that..." Donald groans loud. "Luckily, no one else seems to care otherwise, so we might get off scot-free from it."

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 13\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "Oh. I guess so."

By [Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/QuiverwingDuck) 13\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "If you weren't otherwise involved with others at the time, then it's perfectly okay if you two engaged in some canoodling."

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

[@QuiverwingDuck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) "Hey, there was no 'canoodling!' ...was there? I don't remember a lot from that day, truth be told."

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

[@QuiverwingDuck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) "Except I wasn't involved with someone else at the time." He was still blushing from embarrassment and horror that he might have just ruined a friendship.

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "I only remember some possible cuddling and then we played World of Whifflecraft for several hours."

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "Really? Well, alright then. A day well spent."

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "Now that I think about it it was. We killed a raid boss finally."

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) "Darn tootin'. And I seem to recall the cuddling on your couch...which was nice, by the way."

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

[@DuckAvenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) "I should hope so! I am cuddly after all." There's that ego.

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/thewire/owner/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

[@drakemallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) ”Heh. You sure are.” And there’s Donald stroking that ego.

+++

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

Donald figured he should call Drake after he let it slip that they had in fact kissed (under the wild influence of Cupid's arrows). It wouldn't do for Donald's current love life, and perhaps for Drake's, to leave this be. The phone rang once, twice, three times, then a click.

"Drake? It's Donald. How are ya feeling after that...thing on the Wire tonight?" Donald could feel the cold sweat returning.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

"Like you probably hate me now." Drake had answered phone but it was several minutes of silence before he responded.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

"Hey, hey. I don't hate you, Drake. Sure, I'm embarrassed and there's a pit in my stomach reaching to the other side of the world, but I don't hate you. I could never hate you."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

"Really?" He seemed to cheer up a little. "Thanks."

Drake sighed deeply. "I'm sorry for embarrassing you like that. I don't know why that slipped out. I guess I got caught up in the moment."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

"It's okay, Drake. I think we both did back there. It happens.

"Say, wanna do lunch tomorrow?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

"Sure. Where would you like to go for lunch?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

"There's a new sandwich place in Duckburg. Gladstone tells me it's hot stuff. Probably 'cause he got in free."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

"Sure. I'll see you around noon then? Why am I not all that surprised at that? He gets everything for free. Say. Did I tell you that he ruined my sweater vest once?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 14\. September 2019

“He did? My goodness. Is there a funny story connected to that? You can tell me at lunch tomorrow, I’m about to pass out. Nice talking to you, Drakester. See ya!” Donald hangs up.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 14\. September 2019

"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow then. Good night!" Drake said before they had hung up. He was glad they were still friends.


	3. Duck and Mallard on Rye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donald and Drake get lunch, touch on the Wire debacle, and resolve to be better supers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten by Goku-San (Drake)
> 
> Originally published September 14-16, 2019

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/owner/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago [Comments (20)](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/view/116464/duck-and-mallard-on-rye#comments)

People moved to and fro on the sidewalks, cars sped through lights using every lane available, and the air was thick with their driving noises as well as a layer of chatter among the citygoers. Yup, it was lunchtime in Duckburg.

Donald Duck waddled through the crowds on his way to a new sandwich place that opened not far from Ducklair Tower. He would be meeting his friend and comrade in hero-ing, Drake Mallard, here for a good, old-fashioned catch-up. It had been a long time since the two could meet up and just talk, and an embarrassing ordeal that went down on the Wire the previous evening proved to be the perfect catalyst for this meetup.

Donald couldn't help but snicker at the squishy-looking neon sandwich sign above the door. It was very attention-grabbing. He opened the door and entered, thankful for the quieter atmosphere of patron chatter and sizzling flat-tops. He took a seat and waited for Drake to arrive.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [2 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116465/116464)

Drake appeared after awhile since he had to drive from one city to the other and there was traffic to deal with since many people were taking their lunch break.

"I hope this is it." Drake looked at the neon sign before entering. When he spotted Donald he went straight over to take a seat at the table across from the duck.

"I hope you weren't waiting long. Traffic was a nightmare."

The duck was in his usual sweater vest and shirt that he often wore when not in costume. He looked a little tired though judging from the bags under his eyes.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [24 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116471/116464)

Out of the corner of his eye, Donald spotted Drake entering the restaurant, and he flagged him down to the table he was at. "Drakester! Glad you made it." He held out his hand for him to shake it. "I didn't wait too long. That's kinda what happens in a city like Duckburg. Maybe we should've met earlier..."

Donald trailed off to look at the menu, which was loaded with all variety of sandwiches, from the classic to the unorthodox, with all the trimmings one could ever want. "Boyoboy, there's so many happy hoagies here, I wanna try 'em all! It's so hard to pick just one."

Donald put down the menu and looked at Drake. The bags stuck out like a splatter of paint on a frest canvas. "You alright, Drake? Late nights again?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [23 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116473/116464)

"It's alright." The duck shook his hand before settling in his seat. "Yup. Another long night. Crime doesn't sleep and neither do I. I only got about an hour sleep before I had to get my daughter up for school." Drake hid a yawn.

He picked up the menu to look at it. There was many options which several of them looked like they would not help his midsection.

"I get the feeling Launchpad would like this place." He commented after reading the descriptions of the more unorthodox ones.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [23 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116475/116464)

"Great honk. I thought LP would help keep you on a good sleep schedule. That's what One does for me, but with more nagging, I suppose."

Donald nodded at Drake's observation. "I bet he would. I should ask him how he keeps his figure with all that Hamburger Hippo. He must be keeping a secret from us, eh?"

Donald tapped his fingers on the table. It probably wasn't a good idea to lead off with this, but it was either address it now, or forget and let it languish between them until the next time they could meet up. "So...after that day when we were shot by Cupid's arrow...did anything...develop for you after that?"

"Hello, gentlemen!" said the waitress, surprising Donald out of his seat. "Are we ready to order?"

"Er, y-yeah," said Donald, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'll have the Spanky Irish, no thousand island, extra mustard, with a side of salt and vinegar chips."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [22 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116477/116464)

"He tries but sometimes it doesn't work out when villains are threatening to destroy everything." Drake rubbed at his face. "He reminds me to do other things though like take my medication or get food. Otherwise, I'll forget when I'm focused on stopping the evildoers."  
  
His eyes wandered to his own middle at the comment of how LP possibly keeps his figure. "I wish I knew. Because I would like to know since I've put on some weight." He chuckled nervously and grinned sheepishly.  
  
But his grin faded at the question. He started to say something when the waitress startled him. "Umm..Yes. I would like the Chicken Crispy with lettuce, tomato, cheese, but no onion, and honey mustard. I would like a coffee to drink."  
  
Because he was going to need a lot of them.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [12 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116491/116464)

"Hey, One's been tellin' me I should get into better shape, and you've got a whole gym up in your Tower, right? Maybe we can be workout buddies!"

Donald gulped when Drake's grin vanished. He knew he shouldn't have brought it up. Luckily the waitress came to squash this awkward moment. "A coffee for me too, please."

"Okay, I'll get that right out for you," said the waitress, heading away to another table.

"Er, we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. Say, how's Gosalyn doin'? She any closer to taking up the mantle? Hee hee!"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [6 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116499/116464)

Drake watched the waitress walk away before looking at Donald. "To tell you the truth, I don't know what happened after that day. I often don't know if my feelings or thoughts are real or just my head playing tricks again."

He ran his hand through his head feathers.

"She's up to her usual trouble making herself. It will be quite a few years before she's ready to take up the mantle. I hope." He chuckled. "I suppose I should start using that gym more to keep up with her."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116507/116464)

Okay, not quite the answer he was expecting. "Your head playing tricks? That's the kinda stuff you'd usually go find a therapist for. Have I told you about Jones? He's the one who got my anger under control after...the Spear of Selene. I still see him on occasion. Whatever you're dealing with, you don't have to be ashamed about it, Drake. I told ya last night-I could never hate you."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [4 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116509/116464)

"Basically, what I'm trying to say is if I don't know what exactly I'm feeling." Drake looked embarrassed now. "This isn't the first time I've had a love spell put on me. But I'm also a head injury victim and I'm not sure if I told you but I'm bipolar."  
  
"Thanks. You're a real pal you know that?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [3 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116511/116464)

"I think I remember you saying that," said Donald. It was a powerful vice on Drake's mood. Donald thought again to his own anger problems. They were debilitating sometimes, but he was too stubborn to let them run him with his responsibilites.

Time for some encouragement. "It's okay to not know, Drake. Our brains are so nutso that I don't know what I'm doing half the time either. But I think you've done really well for yourself despite all the bumps in the road. You've got a great sidekick, a spirited daughter, and a city that's lucky to have..." He looked around. "You-know-who," he whispered.

"Thanks. Anything you need to get off your chest, I'm here for ya."

The waitress brought their coffees and said, "Your sandwiches will be right out," before leaving.

Donald started sipping immediately, feeling the muddy brown caffeine water giving him life. "So what's new in the world of...you-know-who?" That topic would probably get them going for a good long while.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [3 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116512/116464)

"Really?" Drake still had uncertainties on his own feelings but it did seem encouraging that it was ok to not know.   
  
Both the coffee and the subject of Darkwing perked him up.  
  
"Oh you know how it. Evildoers threaten the city, Darkwing comes into action, and he sends them to prison. Just last week he single handedly busted a crime ring. They were trying to smuggle stolen diamonds by donating them to a fake charity."  
  
Then he went on telling about other incidents that had went on. Talking about himself, seemed to for the moment had put him at ease. More of his usual self came out to fuel his ego. 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [3 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116514/116464)

"A fake charity? Great steaming skitterbugs...what a way to pilfer jewels."

They did indeed go on about Darkwing's latest capers for a while. Drake couldn't get enough of talking about his heroic exploits, and Donald let him live it up, interjecting a comment here and there every now and again.

A little while later, the sandwiches came. Donald was pleasently surprised at how...substantial they were. "Well, half o' this is going home with me," he said, cutting off a section and digging right in.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [3 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116515/116464)

Drake's eyes widen when he saw the size of the sandwich that was given to him. He poked it and exclaimed. "Well, I'm certainly going to need to use that gym now after eating this. This is going to make my paunch grow more."  
  
He sliced up the sandwich into more manageable sizes. "I was right. LP would love this place." He could picture the sidekick now eating the entire sandwich in one bite. 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [2 hours ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116517/116464)

"Which is why we should be workout buddies. Two heroes keeping each other in tip top shape, friendly rivalry yielding a better body. I tell ya, we'll be on the cover of Supers Illustrated! I could even have Uno draft up the perfect plan."

"Great honk, this sandwich is heaven." Sure, he just talked about how they needed to get in better shape, but life is short. This sandwich was now.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [an hour ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116518/116464)

"Maybe we should ask Quivy for ideas. Since he's Mr. Greek God." Drake grumbled in between bites. His bro loved to brag about his looks which sometimes was annoying and it made Drake feel like a big slug whenever he was next to him. "Then again he doesn't eat.."  
  
He wondered how that duck even still living.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [an hour ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116519/116464)

"You know, that's not a bad idea, Drake-aroo. He's gotta know a thing or two about staying in shape. He's an absolute stud muffin, whereas you an I are kinda...just muffins. And we can leave the nutrition part to Uno.

"How _does_ he not pass out? I've seen him eat garbage the few times he does eat. Maybe we should send him our leftovers..."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [an hour ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116520/116464)

"I think the coffee he drinks keeps him going. And sheer will power." _And also existing to be an antagonist to me. _He shook his head. "He might think we're making him fat if we sent him our leftovers."  
  
"Am I really that--" Drake's face went red when he remembered they had cuddled on that day that they were hit by Cupid's arrow and he had declared that he was indeed cuddly. So Donald already knew the answer to the unfinished question. He also remembered that his bro made a comment about them canoodling.   
  
There was a long groan as he stopped eating to put his face into his hands. "I just realized he might tease us."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [55 minutes ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116521/116464)

It took Donald a second, but he to realized what it would be that Quiverwing would be teasing them about and he went pale. "Yeeeaaaah, he probably will poke fun at us."

Donald put his sandwich down. "But you know what? He's our friend, and I know he'd help us out no matter how much he teases. Besides, we've both saved the world numerous times, so that should be good enough for the both of us, eh? Come on, let's ask him!"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [20 minutes ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116523/116464)

"I suppose you're right." Drake nodded. "Let's finish our lunch and then see if he's around."  
  
He ate what he could of his sandwich and whatever was left he had put into a box as leftovers to take home. He leaned back to enjoy his coffee until they were ready to leave. He wonder what they were getting into by asking Quiverwing about working out and getting into shape. 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [just now](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116524/116464)

"That's the spirit! We're gonna be new heroes, and crime'll be even more scared of us than they already are! I'll shoot him a text tonight!"

Not long after that, the sandwich leftovers had been wrapped up, and Drake and Donald parted ways. Back at Ducklair Tower, Donald put the leftovers away and turned to his partner, Uno. "Uno, I'd like you to build me and Drake a nutrition plan."

"Of course, old bean. But why, if I may ask?"

Donald shot him a smirk. "We're about to step our hero game up."


	4. Tenderize Your Duck Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donald and Drake train with Quiverwing Duck to improve their conditioning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten by Rakish Raven (Quiverwing Duck) and Goku-San
> 
> Still being written at negaverse.net/duckverse

By [Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/owner/drakemallard) 16\. September 2019 [Comments (43)](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/view/116530/rp-tenderize-your-duck#comments)

Later in the day after the lunch with Donald, he showed up at Ducklair Tower to pick up the hero to take him to Quiverwing's headquarters which was a large warehouse in the warehouse district in St. Canard. It wasn't exactly on the good side of town which explained the need for the security system. Even though it wasn't a hot spot for crime one couldn't be too careful.

But it wasn't really a place for someone to casually stroll through anyways as there was nothing but warehouses in the area as they soon saw when Darkwing made his way through the maze of buildings.

"Wait here. Because Quivy and I weren't joking that his security system will kill you if you're not in the system." He said to Donald after he parked near the warehouse when they arrived.

Darkwing disappeared inside and called out for Quiverwing. "Hey, bro? Are you in? You need to add Donny to the system so he doesn't get blasted by your insane security."

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [17\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116561/116530)

There was no obvious activity going on inside the old brick warehouse, but it was a huge space and if only Quiverwing Duck was inside of it, that could be easy to miss. It was a lot nicer looking on the inside, primarily because it was a lot _cleaner_ on the inside. There were a few smaller areas enclosed by walls, but it was mostly an open floor plan. Near the entry Darkwing came through were a sofa and some chairs, not far from a kitchenette.   
  
"Oh, you're here." Quiverwing's voice came from some other part of the warehouse, but he walked up soon afterwards. He was wearing his green mask, and was pushing some safety goggles up onto his forehead. Otherwise, he wasn't in costume, instead wearing some close fitting black shorts and a matching t-shirt. "Computer," he said, "New guest arriving. Name, Duck Avenger."  
  
Quiverwing rested his hands on his hips and said to Darkwing, "It's not _insane_ security. I don't have a remote headquarters, it's otherwise too easy for people to access this place."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116626/116530)

Donald drummed his fingers on the side of Drake's station wagon, waiting to be cleared by Quiverwing's supposedly-deadly security. He didn't realize that this was a hurdle they'd have to traverse on their way to superhero-wordy bodies and fitness levels. Whatever it took, Donald mused.

After a moment, Donald began to get impatient. "Can I come in yet?" he shouted toward the door. Who knows if they could hear him? The place was made of brick after all. Sturdy, even in its abandoned state near the coast of St. Canard. Donald wondered what on earth Quiverwing would have in store for them.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116636/116530)

"It's insane because it's blasts people with lethal force." DW put his hands on his hips. "I guess an alarm wouldn't do? Or just stunning them?"  
  
He sighed a little seeing the tight outfit his brother was wearing which only showed off the drake's fit body which made him feel even more chubby being near him. He was already feeling a little embarrassed that he was even asking for help on getting shape.   
  
Hearing Donald he called back. "It should be safe now!" He eyed QW. "Right?"

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116638/116530)

"Oh, it only blasts them if they get _inside_ my headquarters," Quiverwing waved his hand and took off his safety goggles entirely. "He's safe to approach. Do you want some coffee? Or water? Or coffee and _then_ water?" The only thing that would blast Donald when he approached the door was a faint blue beam emanating from somewhere above the frame, although it didn't seem to do anything at all.   
  
There was a section of the headquarters that was off to the side and further back, and that was where the Knighthawk was sitting on a parking roundtable. Two more such roundtables were set into the floor beside it, and there was a variety of tools and equipment to make it into a tidy garage area. While there was also a part of the warehouse portioned off for a few workshops and office areas, the majority of the space was taken up by the training area.  
  
Taking up at least half of the warehouse, the training area had a small but significant oval running track that helped define its area. It also contained stuff such as the expected free weights and gymnastic equipment, some dubious machines and racks of items not immediately identifiable, a trampoline, and a lot of tightropes and slackropes ranging from ten feet or so off the floor to up near the ceiling. There weren't any safety nets for those.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116640/116530)

Donald trusted Drake's work and opened the door. As he stepped in, a faint blue beam shot at him. Donald quacked in surprise and readied himself to fight, but it quickly became apparent that the beam did nothing to harm him. Soon, it was gone.

Donald sighed in relief and walked up to meet up with his friends. "Hiya, D.K." Then he saw what Quiverwing had decided to wear, and how much better he really looked than Donald or Drake.. "Uh, gee, that, uh...that outfit fits you well, D.K...." He tried to pull his sailor suit shirt down lower in a pitiful attempt to hide his beanness.

When he laid eyes on the equipment Quiverwing had at his disposal, he looked at it in awe. "Wow...you've got quite a setup here. What's the plan?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116643/116530)

"You think you have them tight enough?" Drake raised an eyebrow as he commented on the shorts. "I really didn't want to--" He shook his head. "Nevermind."  
  
This day already had him flustered especially after that talk at lunch.   
  
"So. Where do we start?" 

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [19\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116644/116530)

"Welcome, Don. Don't worry about that thing at the door, it was only scanning your genetic signature. That way my security system won't see you as an intruder." Quiverwing tossed his safety goggles onto one of the side tables in his cozy seating arrangement. "It's pretty neat, I even added an epigenetic module to it. It makes it way more accurate, just in case there's a clone situation."  
  
He rested his hands on his hips, then glanced down at himself in reaction to Donald and Drake's commentary on his clothing choices. "I like being comfortable when I work on my projects here, especially since it means I'm ready to work out at any moment. Speaking of which..." Quiverwing walked over to the kitchenette and opened one of the low cabinets. He hauled out a case that looked like it would be rejected as carry-on luggage due to its size. "First aid kits," he explained. "This one has the defibrillator." He then pulled out a smaller kit, more the size of a large toolbox.  
  
"Anyway, where we start is up to you guys," said Quiverwing, setting the kits down by the sofa, where they were easy to see and get to. "You need to let me know what you're capable of, if I put you right into the training program I do, you might die." He looked up, and grinned brightly. "_But_, you can start by doing a ten minute run on the track to warm up, regardless."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [21\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116682/116530)

"Well, of course, whatever suits you, Quivy," said Donald, hands up near his chest.

"D-d-duh-d-defibrilator...?" What had Donald signed him and Drake up for? "Die? Don't think we're balls of dough here! We're capable heroes!"

With that, he led Drake to the track and after stretching for a moment, he took off at a light jog. "We'll show him, right, Drakester? We'll show him that we can hold our own while becoming even more sprightly than before!"

After the 10 minutes were up, Donald was very warm. He was panting, but not too hard. "Okay, Quivy," he called, "what's next?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [22\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116688/116530)

Drake frowned at his brother when he spoke of the training program. "Hey. Who do you think I am? I can handle anything you throw at me!" He growled a little. Donald's statement only fueled his ego more. "He's right. We are capable heroes after all!"   
  
He followed Donald to the track and after stretching with him, kept pace with the other duck during their jog. He was grumbling in annoyance the entire time and had a lot of things on his mind that he didn't notice he was getting a little too warm. Wearing a sweatervest with a shirt under it was not ideal wear for a workout.   
  
After they had stopped, Drake was panting a little more heavily than Donald and his feathers were puffed out a little from being too warm. "See? That was nothing. So we can handle something tougher than that."

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [22\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116689/116530)

Quiverwing just grinned at the other ducks when they objected to him underestimating their abilities. By the time they had finished their brief run, he approached and said, "Here..." as he threw a black tank-top at Drake. "You look like you're about to collapse, Drakey. Don, if you'd like one as well, I'm happy to oblige. Whatever you're both most comfortable in."   
  
He went to check on what looked like a few heavily modified pitching machines set up nearby. "I know you're not rookies. We can do something fun, and very practical when it comes to training. Trust me, this can be a real workout." Quiverwing draped his arm across one of the machines, which was painted matte black and had a rather long canon-like muzzle protruding from the front of it. "Projectiles. Not actual ammunition of course... I only use that for my own training," he gestured to one of the other machines that looked like it might indeed be loaded with crossbow bolts and shuriken. "Tennis balls or baseballs. I recommend tennis balls to start with, they hurt _much_ less if they hit you."  
  
Quiverwing patted the more sinister machine full of lethal pointy stuff as if it were a loyal pet. "It's good for practicing your agility in terms of dodging, and striking or catching projectiles about to hit you. If you're feeling bold, you have one of these going while you're doing something else, like sparring on the mat there, or doing some free climbing on the walls and pillars... or what I think is _really_ fun," he pointed upwards. "Sparring on the tightropes. But only opt for that if you're very, very certain of your ability." He pointed at the matte black machine again. "I have these set up so they can recognize a specific person they're supposed to aim at, that can get interesting in a sparring match."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [22\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116701/116530)

“Thanks, Quivy,” said Donald, taking the tank-top he was offered, then dashing behind something to change into it.

Coming back, he saw Quiverwing lay out the options for them. His head began to spin slightly by the end of it. “Yeah, if it’s all the same to you, I’d like to start small with just the tennis ball dodging.” He stepped over in front of it, stretching his arms. “You want next, Drake?”

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [22\. September 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116703/116530)

Drake moved off to the side to slip out of his sweatervest and shirt to put the tank top on since Donald was behind something. Not that anyone would look at him anyways if they saw him. He neatly folded up his clothes to lay them on the sofa.  
  
"Sure. I'll go next. But I can handle the baseball balls. I've had much worse thrown at me." Bricks, knives, bombs, missiles...  
  
All came with the job when dealing with evildoers.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [3\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/116985/116530)

As amused as Quiverwing was by the modesty shown by the other two ducks, he had managed to stop grinning about it by the time they had both changed into more suitable workout clothing.   
  
"That works, it means you can both practice at the same time." Quiverwing checked over the pitching machines, testing first the tennis-ball flinger and then the baseball cannon. He did that by having them fire at him, and nimbly catching a few to ensure they weren't being hurled so hard that someone might loose an eye from getting a couple of balls to the face.   
  
"Okay." Quiverwing tossed Donald a small clip-on device featuring a button, explaining, "If you start to feel overwhelmed or just need a break, press that and it'll stop." He tossed a similar device to Drake. "These will start slow, it'll give you a chance to get used to it, but it'll start speeding up soon enough."  
  
Cheerfully, Quiverwing said, "If it's too easy, I can always find a way to make it _much_ more challenging, so don't worry about that." After a last bit of aiming, he started both of the pitching machines.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117009/116530)

Donald caught the device and nodded to Quiverwing confidently. He was pretty sure this would be a good affirmation of his many years of experience as Duck Avenger. "Lemme have it, Quivy!"

The balls started coming one after the other from the machine. Donald stepped left and right as the first few balls passed, seconds apart. After a little bit, they started coming more frequently. Donald pictured them as Evrogun shots coming by, which helped to fuel his mojo. He began to employ more complex maneuvers to dodge them, from ducking backward, to handsprings up, to splits in the air, and even a somersault.

After one tricky dodge, he landed and in the split second between one ball and the next, he noticed how he was panting. He never recalled dodging winding him this much before. Then a ball hit him square on the side of the head. He snapped back to attention. From this point, he couldn't escape a few balls every now and again, and they hit everywhere. His head, his rump, his feet; it was annoying. The ratio of dodges to hits closed rapidly, and soon Donald found himself forced to push the button to stop.

He was panting hard, sweaty, and he could feel bruises starting to form under his feather coat. "Great flipping flapjacks, it gets harder than at first glance!" he wheezed.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [8\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117076/116530)

At first Drake was doing fine. The baseballs were coming at a speed that he could dodge. Handsprings, flips, rolls, and quick hops to the side he did with ease. "Ha. This is a little too easy." He felt his confidence and ego swell.

But that soon changed after a misstep during a dodge when the baseballs had started to come at him at a faster rate.

The ball struck him in the middle of his chest which made him gasp as he got the wind knocked out of him. That split second of distraction was all that was needed for him to get pelted by baseballs.

Drake dived to the floor and curled up to shield himself from the barrage which stung when they struck him as he fumbled with the device to make it stop.

"Ow. Ow." He gasped taking in sharp breathes. "I'm going to bruise for sure." That wasn't the only thing that was bruised however. He had been tenderized like a slab of meat and that hurt his confidence.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [8\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117081/116530)

Quiverwing made sure the machines wouldn't accidentally start firing again before he addressed the two contused canards. "That was very good," he said, and he seemed to be sincere about it, even though the others were gasping for breath. "You both did well. Although I think you'll need to get in more practice at ground level, before you try it while on a tightrope or free climbing." He was going to point out the water cooler, assessed the condition the other ducks were currently in, and then went and got them some water, instead.  
  
"I know _you_ can run on tightropes, because I've seen you do it," Quiverwing said to Drake, as he gave him some water. "I'm less familiar with your abilities, Don... you seem pretty adept with acrobatics, though. I think you both need to do something that's less physically brutal, at least until you stop smarting."  
  
The archer had to think about what could still challenge the other heroes, without outright killing them. "Parkour, or some time on the trampoline for mid-air target practice?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [8\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117084/116530)

Donald readily accepted the cup of water from Quiverwing and gulped it down. "Thanks, Quivy. Means a lot coming from you."

After a moment, he could feel himself cooling down. He stretched his neck and chose his next activity. "Well, One tells me I depend on the X-Transformer too much. I'll try some parkour!"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [9\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117126/116530)

"Thanks." Drake said as he took the water. He greedily sucked it down as he tried to recover from the pelting. His body ached for sure after having sat up while drinking. "You really think I did well? Even after getting a beating there?"

He sometimes had a hard time telling when someone was being sincere or when they were mocking him.

"I guess I'll try the parkour until I'm less sore."

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [10\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117142/116530)

"Yeah, it's an exercise that sounds like it ought to be a lot easier than it actually is," Quiverwing said, to Drake. "Both of you lasted quite a while, but you can probably see why I'm against anyone _starting_ with live ammunition." He let the two ducks catch their breath as he used a push-broom to corral the balls littering the training room floor. While he finished that task, he said, "You've probably noticed that I don't have any safety nets... I can put some up, if you want to try something _really_ difficult, but I think you're both capable of dealing with possible falls."   
  
Quiverwing rested the broom against an equipment rack, and pointed up towards the various tightropes, slackropes, and the support columns and beams that were part of the warehouse's architecture. The lowest ropes were barely five feet above the concrete floor, the lowest beams were about ten feet above, and others were way, way up by the high ceiling. "Don't go up further than you can survivably fall, and don't force yourself to go faster than you can handle. If you want a grapple gun, I have several on the rack, here. I usually keep one on me in case of emergency.'  
  
The archer smiled brightly and rubbed his hands together. "Beyond that, enjoy it. There are some really interesting climbable walls and cables in here, and some ledges that are so subtle you won't see them until you're a few steps away."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [11\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117163/116530)

Donald scoped out the warehouse's architecture. Quiverwing had really thought of everything.

"Gotcha, Quivy. But you don't gotta worry." He stretched his fingers and his neck. "Ready for some rooftop running, Drake-aroo?"

Without waiting for an answer, he jogged to the nearest column and began shimmying up it, intent on reaching a beam adjacent to it. He jumped onto it and hoisted himself onto the beam, with some slight difficulty. "Mental note," he said out loud so Quiverwing could hear, "some upper body work wouldn't hurt."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [11\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117175/116530)

"I already do that everyday." Drake replied before making sure he had a grapple gun just in case. Then he was quickly up a column and onto a ledge he had spotted.  
  
This particular exercise was easier and came to him more naturally as he stated he regularly did this sort of thing everyday. He had plenty of experience scaling buildings and the cables of the Audubon bridge. Plus, there was no hurry so he could be more careful as he picked his way through.   
  
Drake paused for a moment on a beam to rub his sore chest. The baseball hit still stung quite a bit. "Now I'm glad those were only baseballs. If they had been the live ammo I would be dead right now."

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [16\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117275/116530)

Quiverwing watched as the two ducks climbed up the pillars, and when Donald made his remark, the masked archer turned his head slightly and said, "Computer, please note that Don will need some extra focus on upper body strength." There was a very soft chime in response.   
  
Although he remained at ground level, Quiverwing followed along with the progress of the other drakes, perhaps ready to rescue them if a mishap occurred. "There's no rush towards working with the live ammunition. It's useful though when you have stealthy opponents, because they rarely use guns. Being able to catch a poison dart before it can hit you or someone else... _very_ useful as a skill."  
  
Pointing up at Drake, Quiverwing said, "You're clearly quite good at this already, but we'll make you even _better_. You can start doing this blindfolded, soon."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [16\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117290/116530)

Donald took off at a jog down the beam, figuring out a path among that which lay in front of him. He decided to avoid the ropes for now and stuck with hopping to and from beams and columns, doing a spin every now and again.

After some time, he was on another beam and approaching a tightrope. Donald slowed to a walk and stopped short. He placed a foot on it and felt it wobble. He was quite unsure about it, but there was no point in backing out of it.

As soon as he put both feet on it, he wobbled dangerously, but straightened out. Cold sweat was dripping off his brow, and it was a substantial fall should he do so. He had to tread carefully.

He gulped and stepped forward. Okay. Not too bad. He stepped again. His heart was racing and he wasn’t sure why. With a gulp, he continued to step down the rope.

A stray gust of wind from the vent broke his focus and he misstepped. As he fell forward onto the rope, he yelped and tried to grab it. He gripped it with all he had as he dangled from the rope.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [16\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117292/116530)

"Thanks. I've been doing this for a long time." Drake peered down at Quiverwing from his narrow perch. "I don't think I've tried it blindfolded though." He wasn't too sure about that. He had only been blind once and that was difficult just being on the ground let alone high up somewhere.  
  
Donald looked like he was in trouble, so Drake came over as quickly as he could from where he was.   
  
The rope sank and wobbled even more as it took the load of now two ducks when he came across to Donald. Drake tried to keep it from wobbling too much but it couldn't be helped.   
  
"Are you alright? Do you need help back up? Or do you want to crawl across to get over to the other beam?"

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117297/116530)

With his arms lightly crossed over his chest, Quiverwing was watching the progress of his trainees, and he seemed unconcerned when Donald slipped off of that tightrope. He had caught himself, after all, so there was no need for alarm. He only remarked, "You can get in more practice on the lower ropes, later. In the meantime, see if you can brachiate across."  
  
But, just in case, Quiverwing went over to the nearest support pillar and leaned against it just in case he had to climb up. While he _might_ let Donald fall, he wouldn't actually let him hit the floor.  
  
"If you're unsure about doing any of this blindfolded, you can start low to the ground, too," Quiverwing explained, to Drake. "And you can have a blindfold that isn't completely opaque, at least to start with."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117299/116530)

"I can handle it, Drakester," grunted Donald. He exhaled and slowly slid his hands down the rope. As he inched his way to the other side, he could only think about how hard it would be to pull himself up, especially with the pull he felt currently in his arms.

As he reached the other side, he grasped the support column and tried to pull himself onto the top of it. He was having some difficulty. He didn't have the best grip with his arms and his feet against the column and was stuck trying to heave himself atop it.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117302/116530)

"Are you sure?" Drake asked before moving away. He watched as Donald carefully went across the rope to the other side. But it looked like he was struggling to pull himself up the column.

Fearing that the other duck might slip, Drake stepped onto the rope again and went across to Donald's side. The column didn't look like it had enough room for the both of them so he couldn't help him up by pulling him up that way.

Sighing, he wrapped his legs around the rope and maneuvered himself so that his back was to the column. Using his arms an anchor, he shoved his shoulders under the other duck and started pushing him upwards.

"Please hurry. Not only is this awkward but you're heavy." Drake grunted.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117303/116530)

Quiverwing cupped his hand against his chin as he watched this 'rescue' unfold. It seemed a little ungainly, although was probably a reasonably safe way to go about it. Anyway, that was the point of putting the others through their paces, it allowed him to see where they needed the most work.  
  
"We'll need to increase your core strength and stability a little, Drake. That won't be difficult, although you may entertain thoughts of murdering me while you're doing the exercises." Quiverwing said this quite cheerfully. "While I'm on that subject... Donald, how are you with vertical rope climbing?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117308/116530)

“Nah, Drake. It’s no big-GUH-huh-hah?!” Shivers shot up his spine when he felt pressure underneath him. He didn’t bother to look and tried to scramble onto the column. “Heavy? I ain’t that heavy, Mr. Pushing a Guy Up By His-“ It was then that something brushed against his tail. If he had to infer, it might have been Drake’s headfeathers, but he wasn’t inferring. He broke out in cold sweat and heat immediately filled his belly. He couldn’t think straight, and his grip slipped. He yelled in surprise as he felt himself start to fall.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117323/116530)

"Will you--" Drake squawked in surprise when Donald lost his grip. In a panic he grabbed at the falling duck but only managed to grab him by the tail.  
  
The problem was, his mad panic caused himself to slip off the rope. His legs had come undone from the rope sending them both to the floor. They both hit the floor in a tangled mess with Drake on top of Donald.   
  
"Oh.." Drake groaned. "Are you alright?" There was concern in his voice since that was quite a drop.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117327/116530)

"Well ... that was certainly a method of getting back to ground level," Quiverwing told the duck heap. It was an attempt to find something positive to say about the rescue. "Are either of you injured? Please be honest, the sooner we get ice on anything badly bruised or sprained, the better."  
  
Heading towards one of the first aid kits, Quiverwing said, "We may want to take this to the lower tightropes._ However_. I did glean a lot of information from watching you two, oh... computer," he turned his head slightly and was answered by a soft _'ping_'. "Please note: falling practice. Thank you." There was another soft '_ping_'.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117329/116530)

"My tail feels weird..." Donald whined. That would be prime out-of-context material for later. Speaking of, the position they were now in only added to Donald's blush as he scooted out from under Drake. He was a bit dazed and sore where he landed, and of course embarrassment was eating him from the inside out, but otherwise, he felt okay.

"I think I'm fine, Quivs, thanks. I've had worse falls." He dusted himself off and rubbed his tail, which was feeling very off indeed.

"Lemme guess: we're worse off than you thought we were?" groaned Donald, referring to his less-than-graceful tightrope performance.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117336/116530)

"Things happen. Sorry it wasn't perfect in your eyes." Drake snorted. He had really tried to catch Donald and keep him from falling. He just didn't expect to be pulled off the rope because of the falling duck.   
  
"I'm fine. I guess." The only thing that seemed to be hurt right now was his ego. "I've had worse."  
  
Now he started to think this whole thing was a bad idea.   
  


[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117340/116530)

"Mmn... that's not a yes or no question," Quiverwing told Donald. He tossed him an instant ice-pack, anyway. "Both of you are quite good, actually. But there are areas that could use work." He counted points off on his fingers as he talked. "Core strengthening, improved falling techniques, reflex sharpening... honestly, with a week of steady work you'll notice a difference."  
  
Quiverwing rested his hands on his hips. "Look, neither of you failed anything. You had a minor mishap doing something difficult. Do you think your average person could have gotten up there at _all?_ Or taken a fall like that without breaking any important bones? Let me put it another way." He lifted one hand and waved it vaguely. "You know, I train SHUSH Agents in advanced combat and field techniques, and you guys did a better job than they tend to manage."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117346/116530)

Donald took the ice pack and applied it to his tail. Whether it would do anything to soothe this strange feeling, or the bruised ego, time would tell.

"Really? A week?" He thought they'd have to put in much more work to get back to where they were, but after a week, the sky was basically the limit, or so it seemed to Donald.

Donald was touched by Quiverwing's remark. "Great honk, Quivy, I dunno what to say. That means the world that you think that." He eyed Drake. "Not bad for a couple o' self-taught supers, eh, Drakester?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [17\. October 2019](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117350/116530)

"I guess so." Drake shrugged. "Do you really have that much confidence that we'll improve in a week?"  
  
He certainly didn't believe it. He was starting to realize just how much out of shape he become and how much of his own training had been lost since becoming a father. He had stopped his training routine when he started balancing his hero life with his life as a father. His priorities had changed over the years. Those priorities didn't include an intense training program.  
  
Drake got to his feet and cracked his back. "Hmph." He grunted and for a brief moment looked embarrassed as he felt the crack made him seem elderly. "So now what?" 


	5. Tenderize Your Duck Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Training continued.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten by Rakish Raven (Quiverwing Duck) and Goku-San
> 
> Still being written at negaverse.net/duckverse

UNDER Construction

Coming soon...


	6. Drakes' Night Out Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drake joins Donald for a fun night out that gets them a little loopy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten with Goku-San and Rakish Raven
> 
> Originally published on negaverse.net/duckverse from October 13-18, 2019

Prologue

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117124/117117)

In a table near the back, sat a duck in a sailor suit and a red face, though you'd be forgiven for not noticing it among the colorful lighting, and another duck with sideburns in a gray suit and turtleneck.

"I still can't believe you convinced me to do this, Uno," said Donald Duck, squirming in his seat.

"What's wrong, Donald?" said Uno, Donald's android boyfriend, "you know my anthropological research is important to me."

"Yeah, but I never in my life thought you'd want to go to a _club."_

"My research must include the less...mainstream facets of entertainment. The behavior on display here is a gold mine!" Uno said, gesticulating at the scantily-clad male dancers and the drunken patrons bopping in their seats to the loud music.

Donald took a swig of his pint and crossed his legs, his stomach hot with embarrassment and, yes, perhaps a bit of lust. "When you're right, you're right. But...don't you feel weird, being in this club with all these sexy guys...with your _boyfriend?"_

Uno put an arm around Donald. "You needn't worry about that, old bean. I'm fine with you doing some 'research' of your own, because I know who you're coming home with." He winked.

Donald smiled at Uno and gave him a peck on the cheek. "You're lucky I love you."

"The luckiest android ever built." Uno replied.

As Donald sat back to oogle a bit, loosened up, a startling sight caught the corner of his eye.

Heading toward the VVVIP section was quite the pack. He recognized the leader as Aziraphale, the antithesis of that maniac Crowley, in a very...interesting outfit. Whatever preened his angel wings, Donald supposed. Behind him was Faustina, who he saved as Duck Avenger not too long ago. And behind her was...oh, no.

Not Malicia Macawber.

Donald nearly choked on his swallow of beer. He felt Uno pat his back as he swallowed the rest of it and hack out whatever remained in his windpipe.

"Are you okay, Donald?" said Uno. "You look like you've seen a ghost, not that they're real."

"A demon's more like it," panted Donald.

"Come again?"

"Let's get gone, Uno," Donald said, tiptoeing out of the booth, trying not to catch her pack's eye.

"But we've only just arrived! The main attraction hasn't even performed yet."

Donald rolled his eyes at Uno. "We can hit another joint if you want, Athlon. Just come on!"

"You know I hate it when you compare me to lesser hardware," Uno complained, as Donald dragged him to the door.

"Fine, I'll buy you a drink later. But let's go! Anywhere where I'm not in the same city as Mal is where I'll be a happy duck!"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

Text:  
"I'm so glad I made me and Uno ditch that club. Mal Macawber, a sloppy drunk. Frankly, I should've seen it coming."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 2 days ago

@Duck Avenger A text reply back: "I'm glad I stayed in tonight. Well. Not that I have anything to do anyways."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

Reply to the reply:

"I wasn't gonna do anything tonight either. But Uno wanted me to come with him so he could do some 'anthropological research.' At a club! Sometimes I really don't understand what Ducklair created."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 2 days ago

Reply to the reply to the reply: "Anthropological research? Do I dare even ask?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

Reply ad infinitum:

"Quoth the android, 'My research must include the less...mainstream facets of entertainment.' So  
This is Uno, Drake. This also gives me an excuse to get Donald away from his Avenger work. He's gone from case to case lately and become a shut-in. It's not healthy. This is a win-win as far as I've calculated."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

P.S. Reply:

"...I gotta stop Uno from hacking my phone. I suppose he's right, anyway. Plus, I get double the club options, so it's a win-win-win."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

"Uno again. He can't stop me."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 2 days ago

Reply: "Don has become basically me. A shut in who buries himself in his cases."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

Reply:

"Gulp. I guess I REALLY needed this night out then."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 2 days ago

Reply: "And that makes me sound depressing."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) 2 days ago

Reply:

"I'm just pulling your leg, Drakester. Didn't mean any malice. Hey, if you want, you can meet us at 75th and Cavanaugh, The night's still young."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) 2 days ago

Reply: "Sure. I'm game."

+++

By [Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/owner/DuckAvenger) last week [Comments (58)](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/blog/view/117203/drakes-night-out#comments)

Donald felt quite warm and fuzzy as he strolled up to 75th and Cavanaugh in St. Canard with his android better half, Uno. They were out on the town after a particularly busy week with Duck Avenger, and it had gotten to a rocky start when the first club they visited had Malicia Macawber as a VVIP. Donald high-tailed it out of there immediately, and he and Uno had a much better time at the next club, where he invited Drake Mallard along.

Now nearby to another hot club, they waited for Drake's arrival.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117204/117203)

Drake appeared sometime later. He really needed to get out. After that text it made him realize he been spending too much time cooped up in his tower with his bill buried in case files.

He had chosen to wear a button down shirt with a bow tie instead of his usual sweatervest and shirt. He had no idea what kind of place it was and he certainly didn't want another incident to ruin his favorite sweatervest.

"I'm here. So where to now?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117205/117203)

"Drakester! You made it!" said Donald, shaking his hand. "I didn't know you could rock the bowtie like that!"

"Evening, Drake," said Uno. "Just so you're aware, I do not suffer the ill effects alcohol has on biologicals, so I am designated driver. You can have as good a time as you wish."

"Gosh, Uno, you're such a pal, ain't he? So anyway, I was thinkin' we hit that club over there." Donald pointed across the street to a brightly lit marquee with a bit of a line going out the entrance.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117207/117203)

"Ah. Thanks." Drake blushed a little. "I didn't know what kind of place we were going to so decided on something a little more formal but still casual."   
  
His eyes wandered to the club that Donald pointed out.  
  
"Judging from that place, we might need a driver after all."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117208/117203)

"Come on, Drake, let's go!" He and Uno took the crosswalk, letting Drake follow behind, and walked up to the entrance. The two went up to the bouncer, who looked as stoic and brick-wallish as any other bouncer in St. Canard's nightlife district.

"Back of the line, weirdos, like everyone else," the bouncer grunted.

Uno cleared his throat (a purely cosmetic decision) and strode up to the bouncer, whispering something in his ear and holding out a hefty looking currency note.

The bouncer took it and shouted inside, "Hey, Jeanie! Take this party to the VIP room!" He then turned back to Donald. "A hostess will be right with you."

"Sometimes it pays to be a Ducklair," Uno smirked, winking at the two ducks.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117209/117203)

"VIP?" Drake looked a little surprised after the bouncer had announced it. Just how much money did Uno slip him? He followed them in making sure to stick closely to them. The place was crowded and happening tonight judging by the loud music that greeted them once inside.  
  
The club was dimly lit where the only brightest part of the room was the dance floor which glowed in various neon colors that changed patterns every once and awhile. There was people lining the walls and along aside the floor waiting for a chance to get their turn on the floor. They brushed past several tables which glowed in the dark on their way to the VIP section. The VIP section was further back in the club and more secluded from the busier section but more closer to the bar. They were booths with more comfortable looking seating than the tables they had just past.  
  
"So what you handsome boys like this evening?" The waitress came by once they had been seated.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117210/117203)

"I'll tell you later," Donald whispered to Drake as they entered. The atmosphere felt more chill to Donald then the previous two clubs, which was strange considering the bright neon dance floor cycling in its colors, and the pumping trance music. The glow-in-the-dark tables were an excellent touch. It reminded Donald of the neon of future Duckburg, and he felt a strange warmth and homeiness inside.

Perhaps that was the alcohol he had already had tonight.

As they were seated in the cushy seats, Donald turned to the very pretty waitress. "A Canvasback for me and him," he said gesturing to Uno. "How 'bout you, Drake?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117228/117203)

Drake tapped his bill and then replied. "A purple haze."   
  
The waitress smiled and took their order down. "I'll be back with your drinks in a few."   
  
Drake stared at the dance floor while watching people dance. They weren't any dance moves he was familiar with. "Is this what they call dancing now?" He commented. "I haven't been to a dance club since the 70's." 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117229/117203)

"Meh. Whatever groove they feel, I say let 'em feel it. Interesting beat," said Donald, swaying to the beat. "Wait. I thought we were a few years apart...?" He eyed Drake, confused after his comment.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117232/117203)

Drake blinked a little confused himself. "I'm nearly 40. Oh dear. That makes me sound old." He put his face into his hands.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117234/117203)

"Hey, hey, no need to fret about it," said Donald, "I'm like 34, but people say I look a decade older!" He laughed about it, which turned into nervous chuckling, which turned into a groan as he too put his face in his hands. His buzz was not helping matters either.

He removed his hands and let them flop on the table. "So what? We're doing great for ourselves. We've got loving families, great lives, and a bucket list of enemies that wouldn't dare mess with us!"

The drinks arrived just then and as they were set down and the waitress left them again with a wink, Donald took his and held it out over the table. "To DA and DW, the baddest supers around!" He waited for the clink of cheers, then started drinking.

"I suppose technically speaking, I'm the youngest of all of us," said Uno, sipping his drink.

Donald choked on his gulp and quickly swallowed it away, the stiff concoction burning his throat. "Great honk, they make 'em potent here!" He elbowed Uno lightly before setting the drink.

"What?" said Uno, "I was merely stating a fact."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117235/117203)

"I suppose for being a single dad I guess it's great." Where was that drink? He really felt like he needed it now.   
  
The drink Drake received was a bright purple and looked almost like window cleaner. After clinking his glass he took a sip. Donald was right. They did make the drinks potent. He could feel the strong drink hit him like a punch to the throat.  
  
"Oh geez. You're right. These are potent!" Drake coughed and hiccuped up a little. "My throat is still burning."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117236/117203)

"Well, I've had some to drink tonight already, so I gotta feeling this'll send me to La La Land till morning!" He had another gulp. "Mmmm, once you get past the burn, it's woodsy, with that kinda sweetness you get from brown sugar. I like it."

Uno sipped his and looked up thoughtfully. "Brandy...whiskey...white chocolate liqueur...and brown sugar. You were right, Donald."

"Amazing..." said Donald, propping his face up with his hand and staring wistfully into Uno's eyes for a moment. An off-kilter sounding synth riff drew him from his stupor and he shook his head. "Er, didja say somethin', Drakester?" he asked, sipping again.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117237/117203)

Drake stared down into the purple liquid feeling buzzed now. "I taste cranberry in mine and I think a hint of lemon."   
  
By the time he finished his first drink he was starting to feel it more. After a second glass of the same drink he was plastered. Drake didn't hold liquor well. More drinks into him loosened his tongue for sure and he was acting pretty odd now after several glasses.  
  
"Did..I ever tell you look cute and I have a massive crush on you?" Drake laughed before he ended up under the table. "Oh. Look a penny!"  
  
Well, awkwardddddd.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117238/117203)

Another round was ordered after the first one was in their gullets. Donald figured he never did this often so he deserved to treat himself. But as he sipped the second drink, he began to really feel woozy, and he made a mental note to cut it off there. "Waterzs, please," he told the waitress the next time she came around.

Drake, on the other hand, seemed to want to indulge himself. He looked like he was on another planet after the second drink, and after a few more, he was acting rather strange.

And then it slipped out. Donald blushed red as a tomato, though he prayed Drake didn't see it, even in the dim atmosphere of this club. Perhaps it was those drinks, but his belly heated up once again.

Sensing the awkward that had draped itself over the table, Uno stood up. "Well, I think I'm going to visit the dance floor, and, how do you say...'play the wall.'"

"Uno, w-wait! Whereya goin'?" said Donald.

"I'll be around, don't worry!" Uno called after as he walked to the bright floor across the club.

Donald watched him leave and turned back to where Drake was supposed to be. "Uh...n-no foolin'? _hic!_ Ya think I'm...cute?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117240/117203)

Drake peered over the table looking rather pleased by that penny he just had picked up from the floor. It might as well have been buried treasure.  
  
"Of course. Don't you think so?" He replied to Donald's question. He noted that Uno was gone. "I see he's scoping out the dance floor."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117241/117203)

"Yeah." _Hung me out to dry_, he thought. Or perhaps he said it out loud. He wasn't thinking straight enough to discern it.

"I mean..." Donald rubbed the back of his neck and swayed a bit in his seat. "People tell m'that sometimes, but..." His eyes then grew wide. "D-didja say you gotta crush on me?" The blush never left his cheeks.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117242/117203)

Drake looked embarrassed. "Oh dear. I did say that. I'm sorry." He sank back down under the table. "Drinks make me silly huh?"  
  
He was swaying a little himself.  
  
"Was the floor always this color?"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117243/117203)

Donald followed him under the table. "I don't know. It's hard to see." He leaned closer, but struggled to make out an exact color. Forgetting he was under a table, he stood up and met his head with the table's underside.

"Ow!" he groaned, grabbing his head, then he lost his footing and flopped right onto Drake.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117244/117203)

Drake grunted when he felt Donald flop on him. His own face was red now. "Are you alright? That sounded like you hit your head pretty hard." He leaned over to make sure he was alright. 

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117245/117203)

"Hey, you two. None of that in here, this may be the VIP section but you can't just dive under a table if you're going to do a little capricious canoodling." It seemed as if a bouncer or another member of the club staff was objecting to the two ducks getting entangled under the table. A hand reached down and hooked Donald under the armpit, but hauled him out very gently.  
  
Drake, that was to say, the alleged younger brother of the Drake that Donald had arrived with, set the shorter duck onto his feet and lightly dusted off his shoulders with his free hand. "Hello, Don," the mallard greeted him, cheerfully. He seemed completely sober, but perky, as usual. Then, he reached under the table and pulled the older Drake out and gave him a critical once-over. As he straightened his brother's bow tie, the younger Drake said, "I _thought_ I'd recognized you two from across the club." Was it even possible to identify anyone that way in the mix of darkness, flashy lights, and milling bodies? Apparently so.  
  
The younger Mallard was in a perfectly tailored single breasted charcoal suit, a pale pink shirt without a necktie which therefore had a few buttons undone at the collar, and a blue-grey floral pocket square. He had that whole disheveled elegance thing going on. Once he was certain that neither of the other ducks was about to fall over, he adjusted his glasses slightly and said, "I do apologize for interrupting your date, however. I wouldn't normally have done so, but I didn't want you to get kicked out for getting _extra friendly_ down there. To make it up to you both, I shall buy your next round of drinks."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117246/117203)

He tried to pick himself up but found some difficulty in it. It wasn’t until he was hoisted from the table and chastised by another voice that he realized who had happened upon them.

Drake Mallard, aka Quiverwing Duck, was looking sharp as a tack. “Hiya tthere, DK.”

Donald was placed next to the table on his feet, which turned inward and knocked his knees together due to his loosened state.

Immediately, the embarrassment boiled over in his belly as Drake lifted Drake out from under the table too. “Uh, hey! W-we weren’t- That is we, uh- I mean, he a-and I and, Hoo boy...”

He needed to dip somewhere to escape this awkward. A sharp urge in his bladder gave him the perfect excuse. “I, uh, gotta go to the bathroom.” With that, he dashed away, stumbling slightly to the club’s facilities. He squawked in surprise when through the dim lighting, he could make out a sign that said “Closed for Maintenence.” Of all the rotten luck. It was just his luck, after all. Grumbling, he headed back to the table. Besides, with Quiverwing setting them up with another round, it wouldn’t do to break the seal just yet.

He scooched back into the booth and just as he sat down, Uno also returned.

He saw Quiverwing and held out his hand. “Hello there, Q. How nice to see you here! So, what did I miss?

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117256/117203)

"We weren't doing that! Even if we were it's none of your business!" Drake said angrily to the voice.

But soon more embarrassment washed over him when it turned out it was his brother that was helping him up. He didn't even look at him in the eye as he was fixing his bow tie.

"You weren't interrupting anything." Drake said quietly. Just him being foolish and awkward as usual.

In fact, after taking his seat in the booth again, he looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117258/117203)

"Mmn." The younger Mallard's response was noncommittal, as he seemed willing to accept the possibility that nothing had been going on, yet was not convinced that could be the truth. When the missing member of the party returned, Drake gave Uno a sunny smile and a warm handshake. "Hello! I hope you've been having a good evening."  
  
Gesturing to the now seated ducks, the younger Drake said, "Oh, I was just saving these two from themselves, or at least from getting bounced out of here. The staff can get fussy, it's a very image-forward club." He idly straightened his cuff links, then the bead and leather bracelets he was wearing with his watch. Much like his glasses, his other accessories were smart in looks _and_ smart in function, although any electronic gadgets about his person were in passive mode for the moment.  
  
"Gosh, cheer up, you guys," he said, seeing the abashed looks on his brother and Donald.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117259/117203)

“The research I’ve gained this night has been spectacular,” Uno replied, “and it’s been good to get Mr. Homebody here away from the Tower.”

”Give us a bhreak, Quivy! I hit my head under there. ‘S not our fault you caught us in a compromising position, and it ain’t Drake’s fault neither that he got a c-*wheeeeeze! Cough!*”

His rambling beak was about to spill the beans and make a bad situation worse for his friend. Luckily, he caught himself just in time.

“Are you quite alright, Donald?” asked Uno.

”Ffine, Uno, ol pal, just parched. Didn’tcha say you were gonna buy us another round, Drakey? Waitress!” he called out, clapping his hands. The waitress arrived not long after that and stood ready to take their orders again.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [last week](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117260/117203)

"That's true. He hit his head after I asked what color the floor was." Drake's face went red again as Donald almost spilled the beans. He was about to kick Donald in the leg but the cough stopped him in time. "The drinks hit me hard."  
  
Aside from that look of embarrassment and the wanting to die in a hole look, he looked like he could fall over any minute from how much he was swaying in his seat.   
  
"There was nothing going on under there."  
  
He certainly could go for another drink now. 

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117282/117203)

"Now, now. You don't owe me or anyone else an explanation," the younger Mallard held up his hand in a placating manner to Donald and Drake. "That's your own private business. As I said, I only interrupted to keep you two out of trouble with the management here." He looked to Uno again and said, "And yes, I did indeed offer to buy the next round." Was he going to comment on there being _three_ people on this date? No? Apparently he found that perfectly acceptable and normal.  
  
When the waitress walked up, the younger Drake gave her a bright smile and said, "Whatever these three gentlemen would like... and for me, just one finger of bourbon, please. Thank you." He explained his own drink choice to the others in an aside, saying, "Ostensibly, I'm working, so I have to keep a clear head."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117288/117203)

"A Sunrise Special, toots. I ain't workin' tonight," he said, then adjusted himself in his seat, swaying slightly. "'Cause I'm hangin' out with my beeeest friend!" He wrapped his arm around Drake's neck and hugged him a little too close.

"I thought I was your best friend," Uno said.

"We're dating, Uno," Donald replied, "That's like, when those two friens started dating at the end of Anxieties season 3. It's a step above. Y'member that, right?"

Uno cleared his throat and turned to Quiverwing. "So what brings you to our good time tonight, Q?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117289/117203)

"See? I told you you weren't interrupting anything." Drake muttered after hearing the exchange between Donald and Uno. He still felt embarrassed about everything that happened so far.   
  
He stiffen up when he was hugged.  
  
"Tell her to bring something strong for my drink."  
  
_And a shovel so I can dig that hole I want to crawl into and die in._

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117294/117203)

"Hmm, how to explain this without _completely_ explaining it." The younger Drake rubbed his chin, looking thoughtful. Although he was clearly unconvinced that what he interrupted had _not_ been a thruple date, he also didn't seem to otherwise care that it _was_ a date. He said to Uno, "I'm gathering information in and about the premises for someone else. Nothing technically illegal."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117295/117203)

The "nothing technically illegal" part of Quiverwing's explanation would've been a red flag to Donald on any other day, but right now he was a bit too drunk to pay attention to that. In fact, he didn't remember needing to use the restroom earlier.

"Cool!" he responded, still holding Drake close. "Me and Uno were on our way outta one club when I thought, 'hey! Y'know who'd love to be on th' town with us? My bestest best buddy, Drakearootytooty, right here!' Hic!"

The drinks arrived just then, a yellow-orange drink for Donald, a cup with a finger of burgundy bourbon straight up for Quiverwing, and for Drake, a drink black as night that the waitress called "The Lights Out."

Donald let go of Drake, took his drink and raised it up, the liquid swishing a bit with his swaying motion. "T' bestestbest friends that think you're cute!" Donald then proceeded to drink the whole thing in one go, tilting his head back, then slammed the glass down on the table. Indeed, there was only ice left in it. "AHHHHHHH, delicioumas!"

Apparently, he was drunk enough to chuck all notions of responsibility out the window, and Uno cringed a little at the sight. "He's not going to have a good morning tomorrow..." he mumbled. His sensors picked up some active electronics in his glasses, so he turned to Quiverwing. "Fancy spectacles you have there. Are they perscription or decorative?" His face seemed to add, _or are they more than meets the eye?_

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117296/117203)

"Nothing illegal? What are you up to?" Drake frowned at his brother but then he was interrupted by Donald still cuddling him and revealing the fact he had stated he was cute.

Drake groaned deeply and blushed once again as the toast was made and took his drink which he stared at. The name and color of the drink sounded ominous. He wondered if the drink will cause him its namesake.

He took his time drinking it rather than down it in one shot. He could tell it was quite strong from the way it burned his throat and made him feel once it hit his system.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [6 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117301/117203)

After paying the waitress and giving her a generous tip, the besuited Drake took a sniff of the bourbon in his glass, and seemed to find it acceptable. His brother's suspicious question caused the younger mallard's grin to brighten into a bigger smile. "_Gathering information_, as I said." He was _mostly_ law abiding, unless the law was a really stupid one.  
  
He took a generous sip of his bourbon, then said to Uno, "Why, thank you. They're quite versatile, just like me. But I started wearing them in an effort to come across as more mild-mannered." Drake gave a slight toss of his head to get a few stray locks of his headfeathers out of his eyes, but it didn't work and he ended up slightly more tousled. "They assist me quite a bit in my work. Especially in the lab. Although some of the other scientists still call me a himbo."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117325/117203)

"Fascinating. Wh-what's a himbo? I've never heard that word before," said Uno, a puzzled look waving across his face.

Before anyone could get a chance to answer, Donald did. "Izza guy, who's real hot, but also kinda a dunderhead. And Quivster here, is not that, 'cause o' those fancy words he uses sometimes." He hiccupped. "But he's pretty hot. You too, Uno. And you especially, Drake. This is like th' doggone table of hot! Everyone in here should be jealous!"

He may have said that last part louder than he needed to. Also, his bladder was protesting again, so he crossed his legs in his seat. "I wonder if th' bafrooms are fixed yet..." he mumbled.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117326/117203)

"I'm hot?" Drake looked confused. "No one has ever considered me as such and I believe them." He hoped this drink would knock him out like its name claimed it did.   
  
He was sinking in his seat and threatening to hide under the table again as the blush on his face had not left yet. 

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117331/117203)

"It's a less pejorative take on the word 'bimbo' but portmanteau'd with 'him' in order to masculinize it," the younger mallard explained to Uno. "I wouldn't use it to describe another person, but I wanted to be accurate about the nonsense of my co-workers." He adjusted his glasses slightly. "I don't have a Ph.D so a couple of them insist I'm not a real scientist. And I can't deal with them the way I dealt with bullies in school, because I need that job."  
  
Gesturing towards Donald with his glass of bourbon, Drake said, "There was an incident in that bathroom so it may be a while. However, there's another one upstairs. It's VIP only, but..." He gave a vague gesture at the area they were in, then pointed out the discrete elevator. How or why he knew there had been an _incident_ was left unexplained.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117332/117203)

"Thanks, Quivaroonie," said Donald, standing up and stumbling off in the direction Quiverwing pointed to.

"Gracious me, he's in a state, isn't he?" Uno commented. "Being an AI has its advantages."

Donald got in the elevator and headed to the second level. He danced in place as it dawned on him just how badly he needed to go.

The doors parted and Donald wandered around and eventually found the VIP bathrooms, which were, thankfully, not closed. He dipped into a stall and proceeded to carry out some urgent business.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117333/117203)

"An incident? You weren't the cause of said incident were you?" Drake eyed QW. His brother had a knack for getting in or causing trouble so who knows. "I'm surprised you even considered working at SHUSH labs. It's not exactly the best part of SHUSH."  
  
Maybe because his experience with the lab was playing guinea pig for Dr. Bellum.  
  
After finishing his own drink, he noted that he too needed to use the restroom. "Excuse me for a moment." He got up and went into the same direction as Donald. Although, walking was a little difficult now.

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117337/117203)

"Geez, why do you always think _I'm_ the cause, when there's trouble?" the younger Mallard huffed, a little defensive. "Anyway, I needed a steadier paycheck, and I _am_ a forensic biologist. I still do my private investigation work too, of course, but my cases tend to be kind of sporadic. And I don't make a whole lot as a musician, either."  
  
After he watched his brother stagger off, Drake looked at Uno and grinned. "Between you and me, I _was_ the cause of the incident, but don't tell them that." He lifted his glass and winked at Uno, and then had a drink of his bourbon.


	7. Drakes' Night Out Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of their night out, where their awkward drunken shenanigans come to a head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cowritten with Goku-San and Rakish Raven
> 
> Originally published on negaverse.net/duckverse from October 13-18, 2019

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117338/117203)

"Oh my," said Uno, surprised. But then he thought a moment, and decided it wasn't worth it to anybody for him to tell, so he winked at Quiverwing and said, "My beak is sealed."

Donald sighed as he found sweet relief. When finished, he flushed and exited the stall. He looked at himself in the mirror and counted the number of ducks he saw stare back. He squinted at one that seemed to give him a dirty look. "Whazza big idea?" he said, giving hsi reflection the stink eye before turning on the faucet and splashing his face.

Which was more like tossing a few drops on his face and flinging most of it to the floor.

He heard the door open and he looked in that direction. Drake had come as well. "Heya, ol' buddy ol' pal," he singsongingly said. "Yer seal need breakin' too?"

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117339/117203)

Drake nodded before entering a stall. "I've had too much to drink."   
  
After finishing up, he went to wash his hands and splash his face. He felt awful and judging by what he saw in the mirror looked awful too. He did the best he could make himself look better as he straighten out his hair.   
  
"I'm going to regret drinking so much. I feel really dizzy."   
  


[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117344/117203)

"Really?" Donald questioned. "I fffeel great! Like a blazillion bucks! If'n only those three ducks w'd sstop givin' me the stink eye." He pointed at his reflection and clumsily turned off the faucet. To a bystander, he too had too much to drink, but Donald wasn't the best judge of that at the moment.

"Don't worry, my bestest friendaroo-" he began to say, stepping toward Drake to give him a pat on the backm but stopped when he found his foot had no traction. It completely left him under the puddle he made with his haphazard splashing and he fell on his back and slid into Drake's legs, knocking them out from under him.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117348/117203)

"Well I--" His sentence was cut short when Donald slipped and knocked him over. Drake didn't have time to react since it happened so fast plus the dizziness from the drinks. He ended up falling which made him end up in a compromising position.  
  
With his bill on the other drake's.   
  
"I'm..I'm sorry!" Drake squawked in alarm after realizing he just accidentally kissed him. "Oh. This night keeps getting better and better." He groaned as he put his hands on his head after sitting up. 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117351/117203)

Donald's eyes went wide as dinner plates when their beaks met. He felt heat rise in his cheeks and his belly as Drake apologized and quickly climbed off of him. For a moment, Donald stared past him into space, at a loss for words. His brain wasn't thinking, blank and blurry. He didn't know what came next after _that._

"...y'said ya gotta crush on me..." he felt himself say, "Isn't that whatcha wanted...?"

Then, as if living an out-of-body experience, Donald messily snatched Drake by the scruff of his button-up and planted a kiss on his beak. And meant it.

There it was. Drake's secret desire fufilled. He was kissing his best friend in the bathroom of a St. Canardian club while the two were plastered out of their minds.

Donald broke the kiss and all function came rushing back into him. His foresight cleared, if only slightly. He felt back in control of himself, if still very drunk. And the one duck that flashed across his vision was Uno.

He had just kissed someone that was not his boyfriend that he swore to grow old with.

Donald scooted away from Drake and under the sink. He put his hands on his head as his heart rate increased rapidly. "Great screechin' swimmin' holes..._what the heck have I done?!"_ he shouted in panic.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117354/117203)

Drake's own eyes had widen when Donald made his move. There was a rush of emotions flooding him now under that drunken exterior. He didn't know what to say after they had parted.

"Well..umm..I.." He stumbled with his words when he did try to speak.

Yes, his secret desire had been fulfilled. Although, he had hoped it would have been somewhere much nicer than a bathroom. And well, with them not plastered so much that they couldn't remember their own names.

Drake blushed deeply and rubbed the back of his head. "Well, you kissed me." He fidgeted. "Umm..It was accident."

That was some accident.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117358/117203)

"B-b-bu-but I'm with Uno awready! Wha-what w's I thinkin'? What do I tell him? How can I tell him?! He'd be heartbroken!" Donald was certifiably freaking out now. He began rocking back and forth, his slurred questions devolving into slurred stammers and quiet blubbering.

The first person he truly loved in a while and now he soiled that relationship by taking advantage of his best friend's confused feelings. How was there any way to salvage this shameful mistake he brought upon himself?

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117361/117203)

"It was an accident. " Drake sighed deeply. "That's all it was." He moved over by Donald and tried to comfort him. "I'm sorry. I feel like this is my fault for letting things slip." 

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117362/117203)

Donald slowly calmed down as Drake gave him his company. Just having his presence there despite this monumental "accident" that had occurred seemed to soothe him. Somehow, he thought back to Valentine's Day and the day they had spent together. It wasn't quite the same since they were on the floor of a club bathroom, but the comfort and contentment Donald felt being next to his best friend was all the same.

That had to count for something no matter his relationship status, right?

Donald was silent for a few moments, then he said, "I liked when we cuddled on Valentine's Day."

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [5 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117369/117203)

"So did I." Drake said as he leaned against the other drake. He couldn't deny that he had enjoyed it too. He laughed a little. "We're quite the mess aren't we? We're in a bathroom drunk at a club."  
  
He hiccuped a little and rubbed his stomach.  
  
"I'm going to be really sick later. I hope crime takes sick days. I can see the headlines now. 'Local Hungover Hero Barfs on the Criminal While On Duty.'"

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117373/117203)

Donald couldn’t help but laugh. “Better ta be sickh on some dirtbag robber than a passherby!” he giggled, then it slowly died down as he realized the state he was in as well. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna havva bad morning too. I ain’t drunk this much since college.”

Donald was silent once more, learning into Drake as he did with him. His feathers were soft and his warmth was very soothing against the cold tile of this bathroom.

”...can I crash at your place?” Donald asked quietly. “We can cuddle the day away an’ be sick together.”

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117383/117203)

"As long as it's alright." Drake replied. "But I'd like that. Plus, my house is closer." Taking a sick day sounded like a great idea. He hadn't had a break in awhile. So not only could he sleep off the hangover but get a day of relaxation. Although, how he was going to explain his condition to Gos and LP he had no idea.   
  
"We should probably head back into the club and to our table before they wonder we're at."

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117386/117203)

“Uno’ll understand. I’ll make somethin’ up. I think we both kinda need this.”

He wasn’t just referring to the close personal time, either. It was clear to Donald even in his loopy frame that they needed to talk things out. He wasn’t sure what to do about Drake’s crush now that he was seeing Uno. But there was only one way to figure it out.

Donald slowly stood up, being extra careful not to slip again as he made his way out of the bathroom, back to the ground floor, and over to where Uno and Quiverwing were sitting.

”Hello, hero,” said Uno, “you were certainly in there a while. Is everything alright?”

”Yeah, yeah, Uno,” said Donald, plopping himself down. “Had a lot to drink tonight...say, when we leave, can you drop me and Drake off at his house? I’m gonna crash there for the night.”

”Really? What for?”

”Oh, he, uh, wants my help on a case.”

Uno took notice of how Donald wasn’t making direct eye contact with him, and how his fingers drummed on the table. He couldn’t help but wonder if there was something else that happened in that bathroom. He decided to not dwell on it. He trusted Donald as he had for so many years. “Will do, old bean. We can go whenever you both are ready.”

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117387/117203)

Drake followed behind Donald slowly. He felt dizzy which caused him to stagger as he walked. His stomach was flip flopping now.

"Sorry we were gone so long. Had too much to drink. I'm not feeling well now."

He flopped into his seat to keep from falling over. "Remind me to never drink this much again."

[Quiverwing Duck](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/QuiverwingDuck) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117390/117203)

"Oh, there you two are. I was tellin' Uno that if you didn't return soon, I'd be assembling an expedition to seek you out," the younger Mallard remarked, cheerfully. The amount of bourbon in his glass had barely diminished, although that was because he'd ordered another one. Standing up from his louche lounging position, he said, "Anyway, now that you're back, I'd better deal with ... stuff."   
  
Well, he wasn't going to go into his work in any detail, he'd prefer not having another scolding from his older brother, especially since he was looking dead drunk. "Have a good evening, you three. It was a pleasure speaking with you, Uno. I'm certain we--"   
  
Whatever he was certain of would remain a mystery, because at that moment a brightly glowing--almost _blindingly_ brightly glowing--white hole in reality opened up right next to the younger Drake, and a reasonably humanoid arm poked out of it, grabbed the mallard by the front of his shirt, and abruptly pulled him through. The portal snapped shut, leaving behind an annoying after-image and a few fading sparkles.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117392/117203)

“Indeed. I’ve seen enough Anxieties to know what untoward rituals can occur in a bathroom,” said Uno.

Donald gave Uno a look. “You do know it’s not reflective of real life, right?”

”Aw, well, thanks for droppin’ by, Quivalivadingdong. Don’t get into a fix you can’t fix-“

it was at that point that Quiverwing was yoinked away in spectacular fashion.

Donald was gobsmacked, dumbfounded, speechless.

”Are all Darkwings that good at exits or is it just him?” said Uno, just as surprised.

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117398/117203)

"Ha. Very funny." Drake then looked at his brother suspiciously. "Your vagueness makes me believe you're causing trouble."

But he was never going to get him to answer anything he was going to ask when QW suddenly disappeared in a flash of light.

"We all have dramatic exits. I guess this is a new one and I guess my bro found another use for that glitter." He was too drunk to notice the hand that grabbed his brother before his exit and he would have dismissed it as imaginary because of his drunken state.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117400/117203)

“I think I’m ready ta bounce...” said Donald, scooting out of the booth.

”Very well. Let me help you both,” said Uno.

Once any remaining balances had been paid, he helped lead them out of the club and down the street to where he parked the car.

Donald had trouble staying upright, and he stumbled through the city with every step.

Soon, they were all loaded in the car and on their way. The trip was mostly a silent one, and Uno didn’t try to start conversation.

When they pulled up to 537 Avian Way, Donald blinked, having nearly dozed off a couple times. “Drake?” he mumbled, “we’re here.”

[Drake Mallard](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/drakemallard) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117402/117203)

"Me too. I think I'm done for the night." Drake stumbled out of the booth. That dizziness was not going away, so every step he took was unsteady and every moment he looked like he could fall over.

Which didn't help his stomach which was getting worse by the minute.

They would soon find that Drake's silence was because he had curled up in the back and gone to sleep. The Lights Out drink had caused him to go lights out finally. He wasn't even aware he was home or that anyone was talking to him.

[Duck Avenger](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/profile/DuckAvenger) [4 days ago](http://negaverse.net/duckverse/comment/view/117403/117203)

Uno looked in back and found that Drake was not awake anymore. “He’s asleep, Donald.”

Donald cleared his throat. “Great. Guess I’ll hafta carry ‘im...”

”Don’t bother, Donald. I insist.” Uno got out of the car and lifted Drake out like a big parcel.

Donald also got out and walked up the walk. He was starting to get pretty dizzy himself. He fumbled with his keys and eventually, was able to unlock Drake’s front door. He was thankful he was given a key.

The house was dark. LP and Gosalyn must’ve long since gone to bed, Donald figured. He hiccuped and burped at the same time.

Uno came inside and shut the door with his foot. “I assume we’ll set Drake down in his bed?”

”Yeah...” Donald replied, slowly trudging up the stairs. He was panting a bit at the top. The morning would be especially hard, he could tell.

Drake was placed in his bed, and Uno said, “Well, give me a call when you want to be picked up.”

”Thanks, Uno. What would I do without you?”

”That depends on which dumpster you prefer in St. Canard. Good night, hero.” And the Android walked out and left in the car for Duckburg.

Donald carefully took Drake’s bow tie off and cast it aside on the floor. He then got into bed with him and covered them both with the blanket. He nuzzled into his friend’s chest and was soon out like a light himself, comforted like always, in Drake’s warmth. It was an interesting night in their history, that was for sure. One that the two would feel the fallout from hard the next morning.


End file.
